🕳️ Epistemic Void

Unknown Issues

The things we don't know we don't know. Obviously.

"There are known knowns... there are known unknowns... But there are also unknown unknowns—the ones we don't know we don't know."

— Donald Rumsfeld, 2002 (accidentally being profound)

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Total Unknown
Unquantifiable
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Resolution ETA

Catalogued Unknowns

COSMIC SEVERITY: YES

████████ ███ ██████████

If we knew what this was, it wouldn't be an unknown issue now would it?

🌀
EXISTENTIAL SEVERITY: PROBABLY

That Thing You Forgot

You know that feeling when you walk into a room and forget why? It's like that, but for the entire codebase.

🧠
QUANTUM SEVERITY: BOTH

Schrödinger's Bug

This bug both exists and doesn't exist until you observe it. Please don't observe it.

🐱📦
TEMPORAL SEVERITY: EVENTUALLY

Future Regression

A bug we haven't written yet, but rest assured, we will. We always do.

PHILOSOPHICAL SEVERITY: DEBATABLE

Is This Even A Bug?

Some would say it's working as intended. Others would say "intended" is doing a lot of heavy lifting there.

🤔

Peer Into The Void

You've reached the edge of documented reality. Beyond this point lies only the unknown—the bugs we haven't discovered, the features we didn't know we needed, the existential dread of maintaining legacy code.

If you stare long enough into the unknown issues, the unknown issues stare back.

🕳️ Continue to the End

(You have been warned)

Looking for Known Issues? Those are the boring ones we can actually fix.